About Katherine

Katherine and Donald on his 21st birthday
Katherine and Donald on his 21st birthday

My name is Katherine.  I am 50-something.  I live in the Deep South, in Sweet Home Alabama, to be exact.  I was a lawyer until a few years ago when health problems interfered with my ability to work.  i have an empty nest” except for my 4-year-old Shih Tzu, Lulu.  However, I’m never bored.  Never.  I love crafting…making jewelry, wreaths, and anything else that strikes me when I feel creative.  I am learning to crochet and wonder why I didn’t learn this skill earlier. There  is so much to do!  I read.  A lot.  It doesn’t matter if it is on paper, in a magazine, in a book, on the computer or on my Barnes and Noble Nook.  I try to learn new things, such as blogging and setting up a website and eventually a place to sell my crafts.  Since I love to read so much, and I had to write a lot in my job, I am interested in learning to write creatively, not like a lawyer.

At this stage of my life, I am making changes.  I’m working hard to improve my health and mind, to learn new things, and most of all, to get rid of STUFF!

March 7, 2013

So much has changed since I wrote that first paragraph.  My only child, Donald Phillip Gwarjanski, died on August 18, 2012  at the age of 22, just two days after starting his last semester at Auburn University.  At first, my world caved in.  All light was gone.  All meaning in life seemed to be gone.  I am now a different person and I don’t know who I am or who I will be.  There is the woman I was before Donald died, the woman I am now, and the woman who God is leading me to become.   I have learned a lot about things I never wanted to know.  I know that I will one day be able to use that newly found knowledge to help others.  I’m not sure what God has in store for me but I’m pretty sure it has something to do with helping other families, especially mothers, who have lost a child.  At some point, I will start a new blog, but I’m praying for the Lord to help me understand what to write.

8 thoughts on “About Katherine”

  1. Katherine, I, too have lost a son…my youngest and only son (we have 2 older daughters) , to depression/suicide. When he died my husband and I were living in Wetumpka enjoying being the owners of our bed and breakfast “Old Wetumpka House”….I could not go on being the hostess that I was used to being after our loss. My world has flipped upside down and I wonder why and have so many questions for God. We moved back to our home in the Florida panhandle. I hope to hear more from you. I am so glad to have found your blog. I am new to blogging and just found out how to find others who are blogging about their grief from the suicide of a loved one. God bless you…..dale

    1. Thank you for your comments a and sharing part of your story with me. This is such a hard road we walk. I am so sorry for the loss of your son. I’ll be in touch. Katherine

  2. Unfortunately, we have one main thing in common. The loss of our child through suicide. I’m no longer the person I used to be either and I don’t see her ever coming back. I have been a registered nurse for 20 years but I have not worked another day since I learned of her death 4-12-13. I don’t know what life or God has in store for me in the future. I want to help others too, but feel too mentally fragile now to do that. I can’t help people that have been through this. What I really want to do is help in prevention and awareness. I hope I can do that. I’m so sorry about the death of your son. No parent should ever have to go through this. Thank you for finding my blog and I’m glad I have found yours. I’m just sorry that what you’ve had to write about is a reality for you. Rhonda

    1. I hate that we found each other because of the tragic deaths of our children. Your loss is so much newer than mine. I’m so sorry. I wish I could tell you the second year is better, but it’s not. It’s just different. I find myself dealing with things that I was too fragile too acknowledge the first year.
      I believe God has called me to help others in two ways. One, by being a person they can turn to in their time of grief. Two, by increasing suicide awareness and prevention. Unfortunately, awareness and prevention don’t seem like they would have helped my son. It was not something he planned I. Advance. It was an impulsive reaction to something that happened the night or morning before he died. I do not know whet. The only people who know will not talk to me.
      I will keep you in my prayers and thoughts. You can email me if you ever need to. There is another mom I email with and I’d be glad to correspond with you.

      1. This my friend breaks my heart.. To see Rhonda on here and no longer with us. I too believe God has called me to help others as well through the pain I went through…

  3. I have been on my grief journey after losing my son to suicide 9 years now. Perhaps that makes me an “elder stateswoman” compared to some, but I have found that the women I meet where we have this awful tragedy in common, to provide deep, refreshing friendships. Again, I am so sorry for your loss. It is an impossible journey at times, but God is carrying us both along. If He has plans for you that involve helping others, He will let you know as He did me. In fact, He was rather insistent that I journal my pain to Him. I didn’t want to and refused for a while, but finally when I started, I couldn’t stop until it was done and that journal became a book that He published. Who knew? Certainly not me. But the writing has gone on to bless others and blessed me in writing it down, helping to relieve some of the deep pain. Keep blogging. It is good for the soul to share. Keep in touch? Blessings, Gracie

    1. Thank you Gracie! I have made many new friends during this journey, although I’ve not actually met any of them. I have done quite a bit of journaling. Not so much blogging because I was not ready to exhibit such raw pain to others. God is faithful and true, sending me new people when I need them most. Please keep in touch.

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